Every, single one of us who calls themselves "parent" has had, or soon WILL have, those moments when, through your giggles of shame, you begin to question your parenting skills. Or lack thereof. If you're a new parent, don't take this the wrong way, but your day is coming, and yes, I'm smiling a knowing, albeit sadistic, smile as I write this. We all BEGIN with perfect little angels that quickly drive the humiliation of their delivery from our minds. (You want to bring a class of students in to watch? Sure!!! Why not?! Nothing everyone else in this hospital hasn't seen! The more the merrier!) These wee bundles of joy could never cause trouble for us! MY child is going to be perfectly wonderful and I am going to be the best mother. I'll never raise my voice to my child or have to discipline them because they'll love me so much, they will want to make me happy! Hey. We've all been there. Enjoy the denial while it lasts. As I might have mentioned, your day is coming.
For me, the most recent Questionable Parenting Skills Moment (QPSM) came while I was weeding the garden this afternoon. I made the mistake of thinking that, because the children had food in their hands when I saw them five minutes before, they would be occupied. (When will I learn?) I caught a short, tanned, streak dash across the neighbors' backyard toward the stream/drainage ditch out of the corner of my eye. There was that split second of my brain processing the message my eyes had sent... Oh... OH!
My dear, sweet, NAKED little boy was heading off to play in the water in the neighbors' yard. Or should I say, the water that backs SEVERAL of the neighbors' homes. The boy has no shame. He must get that from his father. I don't even like to be naked in front of MYSELF!
Needless to say, the little streaker was quickly ordered to go back INSIDE and put some clothes on. I would like to say that I kept a straight face through the process, but I at least managed to cover up the horrified laughter that crept out by pretending to shield my face from the sun. Thank goodness he was too young to realize the sun was actually behind me!
As I watched his nekkid little butt disappear into the house, I looked skyward and pleaded with God to give that boy some modesty and SOON! Send an extra helping for his big sister, too. She's quickly growing out of skirts with shorts sewn into them.
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